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Stop premature ejaculationat the Manchester Hypnotherapy Clinic

stop premature ejaculation manchester hypnotherapy

Premature ejaculation (sometimes mispelt at ejeculation) is a very common sexual problem experienced by men. In fact, I treat it so commonly that I would guess that it's the most common sexual problem that men experience - but probably the most difficult for men talk about. You can be very confident that you will feel confident that when you contact me and come to see me for a free consultation that you will feel very comfortable having a chat about your problem.

What causes premature ejaculation?

Premature ejaculation is caused by feelings of anxiety before, or during a sexual act. More specifically it is the thought of the potential of 'coming too soon' and the belief that this is likely to happen (from previous experiences) that make premature ejaculation and the emotions involved a self-fullfilling prophecy.

Generally premature ejaculation can begin in our early teens when we learn to masturbate and become aware of how pleasant sexual arousal can feel. Because people are generally taught from a very early age that sex is taboo (parents saying things like, "Stop playing with that", to their little cherub) we learn that there is something wrong with what's 'down there'.

I'm sure there isn't a single male who doesn't remember masturbating and being worried about being caught, and because of this, we learn to quickly pleasure outselves and ejaculate in as minimal time possible to reduce the risk of being caught. On top of this, because we generally learn that self-pleasuring (masturbation) is 'wrong' somehow - this can make people feel guilty and anxious about doing it.

From the very outset of our sexual lives - sexual pleasure for a man can be very deeply conditioned to be a 'quick thing' that should be got out of the way as quickly as possible.

Why do people have premature ejaculations?

Upon entry into our sexual lives with other people - most men are faced with the anxiety of pleasing the 'other' person, and quite often, instead of this being a mutually close and bonding experience, becomes more of a performance. This is partly due to the 'apparent' performance of men in pornography that many males inevitably believe that that is what sex is about, and partly due to the fact that men have learnt from a very early age to 'come as quickly as possible' so actually haven't taught themselves how to prolong pleasure and 'please themselves'.

These factors along with anxiety from bottled up emotions that cause anxiety can often lead men to have full blown performance anxiety.

How to stop and prevent premature ejaculation

Trying to stop and prevent premature ejaculation by 'willpower' is probably the worst thing to try and do. Indeed the key to why this method is usually the most disasterous was discovered by a French guy called Emile Coue (born 1857).

Emile Coue stated that, "When willpower and imagination comes into conflict, the power of imagination wins out".

What this means is if we try, by willpower alone, to stop something that we imagine will, or might happen, our imagination will always win. What we imagine will, or might happen, will happen regardless of how much will power we have to stop it.

In regards to premature ejaculation, what this means, is that if we focus all our attention entirely on what we want to happen and not on what we don't want to happen then we're on the right path big time to sorting the problem out.

All men who suffer from premature ejaculation will notice that just before they do 'go over the edge' they will have thought something like - "I don't want to ejaculate early again". Once this thought, the product of your imagination has happened - it's almost imevitable that you will prematurely ejaculate.

If I ask you now, "Don't think of a blue elephant" - you will immediately notice that for you not to think of one, you have to think of one. It's impossible not to. In the same way, for you not to think about prematurely ejaculating - you have to think about it and bingo - you're imagination wins again as the thing you don't want to happen does!

However, if I ask you, "Think of a blue sky" - you do. At no point would you think of the blue elephant - why would you? By focussing on what we want to happen, and not on what we don't want to happen, what we want to happen happens! In the context of premature ejaculation - we don't - because we're not focussing on it not happening.

The only difference between people who prematurely ejaculate and those that don't, is that those that don't ejaculate to early don't think they will!. Basically it doesn't come into their imagination that they might, or are likely to 'come too soon'.

Guilty feelings often accompany Premature Ejaculation Problems

Very often, people who prematurely ejaculate will identify with feelings of guilt and shame accompanying the experience and feeling of 'under performing'. Client who I see will often feel guilty that they're not satisfying their partners but when you come and visit me - you will learn that these feelings are likely to run quite a bit deeper than you may first imagine.

Premature ejaculation treatment

Conventional hypnotherapy (suggestion therapy/ clinical hypnosis) can go some way to preventing premature ejacualaion but only if the overall level of anxiety of the person is extremely low (and this is very rare in many people). The best approach to permanently sorting out premature ejaculation is by releasing the bottle up emotions that are causing the anxiety which in turn feeds into the symptoms of premature ejaculation (using Pure Hypnoanalysis) and then, if necessary using suggestion therapy to re-train the mind to respond in a different way to thoughts about sex.

Most hypnotherapists in practice are only qualified to practice suggestion therapy, which as a sole treatment for premature ejaculation will rarely work in the long term, if at all.

Further information on stopping premature ejaculation

Control Premature Ejaculation (Methods of controllilng premature ejaculation)
Remedies for premature ejaculation
Young men with premature ejaculation
Premature ejaculation kegel exercises
Premature ejaculation more condition symptoms

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